Classic english jokes

《英文经典笑话系列》

a frog calls a psychic
these chickens want books
a snail buys a fast new car
a very insulting parrot
the story of the bats
never talk to the parrot
i'll use my seeing eye dog
there was just a dog fight
a game of animal football
i think that i'm a chicken
this dog is acting bad
investigating a terrible accident
cow on train tracks
installing a carpet
an engineer and a programmer
flying without a parachute
ablind pilot is flying this plane?
the whole world could be happy
are blind pilots flying?
.there is a blond on the plane
air force one crashes
the blind skydiver
boarding from what gate?
fear of bombs on planes
a skydiving lesson
there are no dogs allowed here
a blind man visits the state of texas
buying your ticket
hiring an accountant
simplified 1040 forms
did you pay taxes?
accountant and farmer
stop being late to work
the work qualification test
the copy machine handout
why did he fire you?
everybody, somebody, anybody, and nobody
the requirements of this job
repairing the phone
fake two dollar bill
paying in advance
travel in a sailboat
wealthy investors
a walking economy
investment counselor
buy machine factory
an economist's speech
an economist's logic
economist valentines
i have a big problem
halfa year to live
economists in parades
bill gates picks his own punishment
low self-esteem
i often feel guilty
interviewing crazy
a lecture about english
researching this insect
bragging about japan
eating the piece of fruit
try to settle the dispute
what is this?
are caterpillars good to eat?
we could have been here sooner
thin people don't
i did all of that?
golfing with an older man
an engineer, doctor, and pastor golfing
slow golfers are ahead of us
consultation fees
that's a real bargain
the devil's offer
you've changed my mind
some last minute requests
get money to heaven
brain transplant
want to go into space?
a love for material goods
i just managed to settle an account!
did you make a donation?
free haircuts
are you talking to me?
……

number 88
three please
4 million iraquis
cheering up, bush
future handicapped
controversial diagnosis
doctor helps prisoner escape!
i can't feel my legs
new skill
pneumonia
remove an appendix.

six months more
sleeping pills
the same age
we need eggs
good memory
happy old man
you forgot my toast!
birthday gift
cook like that
henpecked
petty argument
which one mom
husband store
patient mom
dumb blonde
parents age
ask for your father
tearing them up
full cup of coffee
good and great lawyer
an inquisitive kid
children's prayer
farmer joe
farmer's divorce
going to hell
one less lawyer
a pickpocket's lawyer
three rooms
what instrument did you play?
alcohol test
magic pool
speeding ticket
optimism
a nice idea

female reindeer
army insurance
never work again
the crow and the rabbit
911-actual call
car broken down
circusowner in bar
donkey eats buyer's money